Monday, December 21, 2015

DNA

Have you ever made a list
And thought it an echo
Of a previous itemization
The twist--
That you had not changed too much--
As comical as it was
Clear. 

~

RNH

On Accident

Totaled by the collision
On one side, the heart
The other, the twinkling, spinning
Mind. I wonder
What stopped them before
And why they embrace so
Resonantly now

~

RNH

Wednesday, December 16, 2015

Liable

while she hid under her hat,
my quiet gaze traced
along her shoulders,
dropped down to her waist,
and as she stared,
my hungry thoughts
poured upon her lips.

~

RNH

shutters

The double-hinged doors snap
shut, the curtains
pull, the blinds tumble, cognizant
of the seeing
heart
and with lashes pressed
I disassemble every plank and nail
between us.

~

RNH

indomitable

though the fear
may cloud around us,
we will have hope.
though the darkness
endeavors to surround us,
we will seek the light.

~

RNH

Tuesday, December 15, 2015

Hallelujah

and the trees
lifted their arms
in the descending sun's glow
as if to say
all at once
Hallelujah.

~

RNH

Monday, December 14, 2015

Stack

The rulers stacked themselves
In precarious, mile-high
Towers of expectations, and the taller
The anticipation, the greater
Clatter of the fall.

~

RNH

Rift

safety waited
in the distance, under slow-branched
trees and reassuring shade
for now,
the uneven road will guide you
nothing to be learned when
everything is smoothly paved. 

~

RNH

sleeping on your side

and at some point, you realize
that both sides
are yours. 

~

RNH

Tuesday, December 8, 2015

One by One

Let the buoyant emotion
Lift under shoulder blades
And satisfy a rib cage's broken
Shuddered breaths
One by one. 

~

RNH

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

zen

the master sat down
and rebraided her hair
let her wrists rest on the v-upturned
bends of her knees, exhaled
deeply and reset
like the pleats on her uniform and the bamboo
pieces
in the thatched roof.

~

RNH

sacrificial

you are not to be sacrificed
you are not an offering
of chopped muscle on a plate
you are not a sweet-smelling thing
to be burned
you are not a chest of treasure
you are not piles of gold
there is no many-zeroed ransom
for your multidimensional persona
and your love should be a freely
given affection
and unmistakable, its worth.

~

RNH

the closing side

when the anger, like an envelope
attempts to stick each corner
to the closing side, i
writhe my way out of its convincing
grip and speak
the truths that perfuse these lines.

~

RNH

Monday, November 16, 2015

soar

You will feel you are about to break
one day
you will bend as your overburdened shoulders
hunch deeper
and the wings that you soared upon
so proudly, will cringe
and you will wonder if
they were meant more for folding
than for flying
and one day
that black cloud will follow you around
and one day those painful
memories will hover near
and you will want to give up,
but don't.
The strength that you need
has been within you all along. 
This is simply the moment
to prove it.

~

RNH

fertile

A burst of gold and green
Blankets a memory that endeavors
To grow and although
The ground pretends her hard
Surface extends further, just
One press  
And rebirth begins. 

~

RNH

skeleton walks

ribcage full of tornadoes
how they twist
how they rise
into grand cornucopias of gray
a bouquet for each breath
and the skeleton walks
unrevealing. 

~

RNH

icing

icing on your fingers and lips
a fine, soft fall of glitter, a pre-snow 
to the promise
like the beautiful things that you cannot
get enough of and the lingering
sweetness
that you cannot resist. 

~

RNH

Thursday, November 12, 2015

Sweep

spiderwebs crowd the content
broom to the corners and I sweep
their tangled tethers from my waking
eyes
disassemble their view and rewrite. 

~

RNH

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

Binding

The silence is a voice, too,
and through the screaming clatter
pierces the shorn two
edges
making them meet. 

~

RNH

Sunday, November 8, 2015

ping

felt the ping-pong of the heart, glitter
shimmer with such radiance
at the silly charm and the tenderness
flitting disco ball rainbows inside. 

~

RNH

Just Strings

for a moment, I
was not this body 
or this voice, I
became a violin
and lifted joyfully and played. 

~

RNH

Saturday, November 7, 2015

Upstream, Downtown

oh, how the whistle blows
when three bartenders ask for the girl's
request and answer
another man, ringed, swivels
to glance sideways when his
wife's gone and she sips
their knee-deep glances and keeps
wading, smiling
through the people, upstream.

~

RNH 

Friday, November 6, 2015

fend

the sword strikes down at the middle
of the rapier
with a clang
echoes through the valley,
the grass trembles and creatures,
small, flee into the mist. 

~

RNH

Black Fuzzy Caterpillar

How could you let me go ?
Said the cocoon to the spotted moth.
With stretched wings, Because,
It was time
To grow, as all things must
And do.

~

RNH

Dr. Frankenstein

transfigured from cherubic
to ghastly, the divided heart,
a Frankenstein of twisted purple-gray
muscle coiled with barbed wire, 
with each pulse
the amber beats against her cage
mental manifesting alive
as the saline
whittles her 
soft edges
and the monster bleeds without fear

~

RNH

Sunday, November 1, 2015

window prayer

these are the windows
of my heart
and my mind
that I may stay open
so that everyday the light
can pour in 
and shine out. 

~

RNH

Anti-Violence

have to let the sharp things roll
away from me
they call my name
and whisper control
lies
to the effulgent ghosts
that sway in peripherals
hypnotically

have to let the spirals unravel
as far as they need to 
collapse to remember
the power of rescue is always 
one breath away
with the antidote
balanced 
in my hands. 

~

RNH

Friday, October 30, 2015

Belonging

is not something forced 
or imagined. 
It is a feeling of safety 
without nets. 

~

RNH

escape

night envelops
gathers the mind in a basket
lifts to the moon...

~

RNH

Thursday, October 29, 2015

Jeweled

The fog blurs the vision
Objects hover in the distance
Spherical gems, Faberge
Jeweled eggs of memories
I've taken hammers to
Because I'd rather have clarity
Than any fictitious beauty
Because I'm better off now
Than I ever was loved
By you.

~

RNH

Tuesday, October 27, 2015

humming reminisce

pin-drop fingertip tapped lovingly
reminded you of a song
you once knew. 

~

RNH

Headshot

oh, crest of close scrutiny
please break, please acquiesce
to the repeated, humbled
requests, from shoulders stooped
from praying
to be unyoked 
from you. 

~

RNH

Monday, October 26, 2015

coil, gray

there is a constant desire
to curl
to regress from feeling and surroundings
spurn, to centipede-like
wrap myself tighter
into a coil
of silence
I keep folding
and unfolding 
where it hurts.

~

RNH

Sunday, October 25, 2015

archangel

standing on the top 
of the neon-lit
wheel, she 
tilted
her arms wide
ready
for the fall that angels
revel in...

~

RNH

commas

a wave
they spill and dive
across the sky, a cloud
of commas tornado and take
flight...

~

RNH

cat-food breath

he'll rub his little
triangle
face against yours
in case you
wondered what he had
for dinner.

~

RNH

Tuesday, October 20, 2015

buckets

spilling over, the remainder
from so many buckets kicked
over sideways
littered emotions, balled up
tumbleweed in opposite
directions
the contents, not
worth saving.

~

RNH

coward

I have many words for you.  
None of which 
make me proud. 

~

RNH

Saturday, October 17, 2015

Love Truly

Love truly
Requires you to let go
Of the very person you
Long to hold the most.

~

RNH

Thursday, October 15, 2015

Twain

There is always a fascination
between the object
and the painter. 
If not, there would be no need 
for canvas 
to separate the pair. 

~

RNH

the feathered sort

rearranging feathers,
a decadent ballroom
dress, tiers
spilling from waist
to floor, rustles
with the impatience of lovely
infatuation
preens herself
in the tawny gaze of the adored. 

~

RNH

bookends

emotions wobble without bookends
threatening to tumble from 
off their shelves. 

~

RNH

Open Letter

Dear singular black lamppost
that I almost hit, but didn't,
Thank you for not moving.
For representing the obstacles
that will always be in our lives, 
the things we must confront
and persevere through...

Dear grocery store clerk,
Thank you for putting the heavy
boxes of kitty litter into my cart.
Not that I am not 
capable of carrying my own stuff, but kindness
is strength...

Dear tiny yappy dog at the vet clinic,
It is okay. 
And thank you for reminding me
that we all get freaked out and nervous
sometimes. 
And sometimes our fears are more precarious
than the circumstances...

Dear spectacular sunset,
Wow. And thank you for slowing 
down the time for just
a minute.
Thank you for the comfort
in your colors.  

Dear overwhelming flood of grief,
We must learn to coexist. 
I will hold you through the darkness, if we
can both make the light,
at the end. 

Dear spiral of universe,
I am so amazed by what I see
and hear and feel at times, that I hesitate
to tell you...
I am afraid that nothing I create
will ever suffice...
Here is a beginning. 
A small prayer in the appending
of pen to paper...
A reconciliation. 
This is my
open letter...

~

RNH

Tuesday, October 13, 2015

scathe

the loneliness feels corrosive
scrapes at the shoulders
and knees
of my faith

~

RNH

Friday, October 9, 2015

carved star

if the stars swirled in my inscriptions,
I would write for you whole galaxies. 

~

RNH

self-image

the need for reinvention
took slow turns at intersections
years unhinged from forced labels
desiring only choice
and quiet. 

~

RNH

Wednesday, October 7, 2015

drawn seaward

when did gaze become
such an undercurrent
a riptide
drawing
the flukes of my anchors.

~

RNH

Monday, October 5, 2015

author, i

i am already writing your story
more than you have ever lived.

~

RNH

The Boot

a boot
pressed into the bar chair
makes it easy to remember why
i (push)
do not come here.

~

RNH

scope

a crowd full
of cymbals, crashing
voices raising, exasperated
reprimands and laughter
the clink of scoop to ice
into glasses
and a cash register--
all these peripheral
to you.

~

RNH

futball

Football
Football
Football
A boulder crashing
In your cup of tea.

~

RNH

Thursday, October 1, 2015

uphold

the house fell
without any structure
to uphold it
you stood waiting for the roof to cave
instead of rebuilding.

~

RNH

Sunday, September 27, 2015

fiery

steps push against the wind
seeds crush under a fiery gait
and the ache between my shoulder
blades lights
a small spark to the bloom
of bursting splinters
in my chest.

~

RNH

mournful

even the rain is beautiful
the sky mourns an irreparable
loss, too.

~

RNH

Friday, September 25, 2015

the arrow

they say that you are bound to resist
the arrow pulls back
from the direction, no sway
over the string
and yet, no path could ever
be reached without such tautness
that resistance
creates who you are
and the eventual place
you will be.

~

RNH

Thursday, September 24, 2015

kickstand

a mood of chocolate
tilts the air
in a picture
i can almost taste
us speeding down the highway's
curves, your gloves gripping
the bars, my arms,
your waist and as the darkness howls
i
brace for an impact that i will never see
more silence and those shoulders
turned away from me
straddling this beck and call
of ours.

~

RNH

Persephone

she inhabited me like a season
the way the world is transformed in every
breath, sight and sound 
she altered me
wholly, so that my steps
were no longer mine
to begin with
their composition
dissolving whenever she
appeared.

~

RNH  

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

last leaves

through turbulence,
we often feel like last leaves
barely hanging on
the stem of a ligament of branch
the connection, vulnerable and thin
in better light, we see the evergreen
of our forests
the shelter we provide and the frailty
from which we all begin.

~

RNH

Tuesday, September 22, 2015

if i

you said i could do no worse
if i simply wanted you
to leave
i closed my mouth
upon the words
and lay my hands down
in their fire.

~

RNH

Monday, September 21, 2015

halo

crest of feathers
flutters, waves dramatic in the summer breeze, a crown
of amber halos, frames
the sky, akimbo arms, your knees
direct a dress's folds, i wave
and buckle when you notice
me, the light
shines through in places, all
the pieces
you throw
at me, when you smile.

~

RNH

desert island

it was so easy
to paddle into deep water
when the shore was ever-moving
and perfect as a memory.

~

RNH

Sunday, September 20, 2015

Vessel

worth is a vessel
you create on the inside
soft clay spinning, molding
the shape
you
pour forth.

~

RNH

Thursday, September 17, 2015

The Draft

the mannequin
with the heel of his palm
in her hand, pressed
cauterizes under her gaze. 

~

RNH

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

A Responsible Voice

she tells the other students,
be patient
take a deep breath
it will be okay
my phrases, her patting hand
on their shoulder
this is why I am
so mindful
of my tone.

~

RNH

Monday, September 14, 2015

globes

when the sky turned navy
and the pool, a midnight, too, under the lights
small bursts of white and clementine
i knew it was time
to go home.

~

RNH

trees cast

in the twilight, trees cast
gigantic shadows on the ground
eerie, spherical, their fans
of fingers splay
fearless of the in-between.

~

RNH

Sunday, September 13, 2015

Tigers and Queens

for a moment, they paused
for half-seconds, lay still
long enough to be 
photographed
almost as if
they knew. 

~

RNH

Thursday, September 10, 2015

rain about

blur of particles creates a sheet
a wall of waves, an untethered sea
and as the curtain
ruffles, the linen
sweeps over the windows
erases
with gray.

~

RNH

Wednesday, September 9, 2015

brand

failure
is a word
I will not let
leave its mark on me
instead, I will bend
press and amend
its letters
so it says,
I have tried. 

~

RNH

Tuesday, September 8, 2015

in the flood

caverns fill with water
and everything valuable
loses sheen.

~

RNH

electricity

she said that when you are struck
by lightning, it changes
the electricity in your heart
maybe that's why
we quiver in the headlights
every glow a reminder
that one day
we will be stopped.

~

RNH

small shell

ducked back down into the tepid
green water
as if whatever hovered just
above the surface,
he feared.

~

RNH

Monday, September 7, 2015

cookie truths

gingerbread man
with his foot in his mouth
keeps hopping away, on one
pendulum.

~

RNH

somewhere

piano to the sentences
i will not say
i will not say
the indentation of fingers
to keyboard like pressure
in clay
transformed, but intact

strings to the volatility
i will not express
i will not express
the plucking of fingers
on triggers like chords
in a hollow
empty but echoing loud

palms to the bongos, heart's
thumps, pulsing, argues
and muscles
the emotions that earthquake
inside, i
reach in the darkness
contend with the blindfold
fumbling through silence
and expect to find

the instrument
hangs
on a wall somewhere
and voices
what i will not let
speak.

~

RNH

Sunday, September 6, 2015

the accordion

cherishing the symmetry of text
to image, imagery to
to text, i revel
in the monochrome, the fan
unfolding, the allusions
deeper than you think.

~

RNH

Saturday, September 5, 2015

4th Street Universe

in the kaleidoscope,
a pinwheel of people
spins, each twist
an octopus unfurling her arms
a jacket full of gems.

~

RNH

Thursday, September 3, 2015

poinsettias

the Christmas wreathe held out
its flowers, red and fragrant, specific
as cinnamon
and pine needles, presents wrapped
meticulously by familiar hands.

~

RNH

Tuesday, September 1, 2015

not anyone else

i am not responsible for the choices
of anyone else
but i am responsible
for my own.

~

RNH

Sunday, August 30, 2015

tall, empty

grandfather clock
sat with her
pieces strewn about her
knowing the copper and steel lost
mechanisms would fit back together
with determination
and time.

~

RNH

Saturday, August 29, 2015

record that

scissoring memories from places
abrading voices
from heart strings
the loop
with skips and static, leaps forward
serenades the block
at the window, sings. 

~

RNH

our names

we wrote our initials in sand
on tables, on the backs of doors
as if trying to hold on
to something elusive.

~

RNH

Friday, August 28, 2015

identical motion

in ten years from now
your bones will be the same
your eyes will look
with identical motion
your heart will still embrace

in the exact way
you greet someone and welcome
them into your life

i know, because i have witnessed
the extension of a palm
the opening of a door
to more than this.

~

RNH

burst

like a firework, the burst
of an unnamed star
upon your lips.

~

RNH

soho tide

neon flickers, sweeps
across the room, a tide
of impulse and electricity
exclamations flit from cushion
to bar stool to the beckoning
dark corners
pounding eighth notes, collision
of desire in the blur
of a smoke machine
leans
my hand into yours
at shoulder and waist, we fit
together, circling
that crooked smile, scooping
up the downbeat and the one-two
cascading like the stage lights 
pink and yellow.

~

RNH

ghost story #9

his shadow
fell across her, light
and dark, a mesh
of skin
and in the wave
that crashed between them
dawn obliterated
and night will never end.

~

RNH

Thursday, August 27, 2015

clink

spool unraveled,
rolled gently off the table to the floor
and clinked
guess she did not
need that tenuity anymore.

~

RNH

short like a chair, short like a bus

our joke
is in two languages
and our two faces boomerang
with laughter. 

~

RNH

a trace

divided by rivers
obsidian silhouettes, liquid
spilling broken silk
the inked pen
pouring lightning down her face...

~

RNH 

Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Pair

held out an arm
to a twinkly-eyed vampire
twin dots marking
one for the poison
one for the tranquil
sleep bequeathed.

~

RNH

Cyclops

I'll remember you, transfigured
the one eye occupying your throat
the small space between your chords
and clavicle
vibrating
every time you blink.

~

RNH

embryo

thin tissue, a bubble
floats, thought-like
promises
the iridescent and new.

~

RNH

animal

asphalt on bare knees
a bruised lip and too many
scars bleeding, lying
open to the rain.

~

RNH

Rapunzel

ribbon of brunette coils
around four fingers
silver beads pooling on stone
eyelashes pressed, lens
swivels to recapture
the darkness
full of her voice
and my name.

~

RNH

Monday, August 24, 2015

in the park

I turned, as if I heard
You running in my direction
anticipating the huff and smile
of your pink cheeks, telling
me this happened and then this happened
and then this, too...

~

RNH

Shrooms

The mushrooms stood like small
People popping up from the grass all
Wearing their round hats
Calm, among the blades.

~

RNH

Sunday, August 23, 2015

through magnification

sander to the square, white tiles
raised words
flattened by the glare 
careful sun through magnification
allowing the truths to adhere. 

~

RNH

a severed man

there was a man by the side of the road
at least, i thought i saw
him, charred
chopped at the waist, tangled
and lashed down to the fence.

~

RNH

Saturday, August 22, 2015

dwellling in fragility

a thousand little sticks built
this humble, one-room house
each corner sure, each frame uplifting
walk through this door
and you will understand.

~

RNH

Friday, August 21, 2015

sheep's clothing

wolf under sunburnt skin
itches at the moon
keep finding bits of fur under fingernails
tongue licking the sharpened 
point of a tooth. 

~

RNH

Thursday, August 20, 2015

stencil

fidelity
to one's pattern, arching
in the tactile, folded lines
bending content
into wings of paper
gallant ships across the chalkboard sky.

~

RNH

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Impossibilities

and in the darkness
even the impossibilities seem
tangible
as if you could
feel the stars
upon your fingertips.

~

RNH

time span

dusk sank deep and warm
orange eye burning through the blue
time span slowing down for change
the beautiful blending of the hues.

~

RNH

poeta

the poet cried and rested in folded
arms about knees
and clung to the idea
of you.

~

RNH

Friday, August 14, 2015

praying for peace

circular, the path
lead back to where you started
and the questions, all
were answered
in your prayers.

~

RNH

strike

adore
does not begin to cover it
with you
i will search for the words
and omit them.

~

RNH

leaf

what's left
of your conscience chews
away at the image
like an insect gnawing
bite marks into your seams. 

~

RNH

two-face

must be hard to look in the mirror when you
behave that way
find yourself
in dark corners, frantically
looking for an escape. 

~

RNH

Friday, August 7, 2015

telling meaning

the sign for
"change/adapt/adjust"
is so similar to
"reverse"
only a switch of wrist
movement would tell you
otherwise.

~

RNH

in the library

i was your book and you
studied each dedicated page
turned by your hand.

~

RNH

Thursday, August 6, 2015

Zoë

everything she touches turns
to gold
either irreparably brilliant
or frozen.

~

RNH

marathon

it was a pommel horse of a day
and she could leap
or be left behind.
there is always another hurdle.

~

RNH

crinkled

i held her wrinkled hands
and my heart
crinkled
under the air conditioning
of the hospital
and the imperative to say goodbye.

~

RNH

a lost boy

maybe you wanted to be alone
and so i gave you
that space, free
to choose.

~

RNH

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

fear, itself

fear of the unknown
causes us to doubt
and recoil.
but i am not afraid of dying.
and i am not afraid to love you.
of that much,
i am sure.

~

RNH

repair

the way our stories get closer together
when we're afraid,
when there's tragedy,
when the complete loss of life
is amazingly capable of restoring others.

~

RNH

at the mercy

she picked up the edges of her dress
and clicked her miniature
heels together
and i cherished her the way that i always did, at the mercy
of her six-year-old-sweet dimples.

~

RNH

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

skull full

when did the skeleton become
such a harboring device, full
of incipit needs tangled
like crepe paper
ribbons in my bones.

~

RNH

ode to be

oh, to be
the harmony to your chords
the comfort to your restlessness
the light that leads you home.

~

RNH

jellyfish

harmless enough
the danger floated, gelatin thought
to the surface
oblivious you
keep poking the blooms
with your stick.

~

RNH

switch and blade

he said you have never
experienced anything as painful
as this
and i glared
at the dire omission
of the truth.

~

RNH

Monday, August 3, 2015

I Will Say

before i start to complain,
i will say
thank you
first.

~

RNH

bow of a woman

more than your pieces
you are a sum
of a greater part
connected to each person
you reach out to, each voice
a spectrum of colors, each bow
embraces you, as well.

~

RNH

Thursday, July 30, 2015

dome

with beach sand
stuck to calves and flip-
flopped toes, i look
into the cerulean dome
of sky
ponder the ambiguities of life
the distance between
us and the hearts
that beat beneath bone cages.

~

RNH

A Moral Confrontation

While visiting family recently, I listened as someone described how, over the years, they had learned to simply walk away from aggravating people. Acknowledge the moment, but keep moving forward. That the audience did not necessarily require one's emotional, though perhaps deserved, response.

I try to remember her words now, on the days that prove more difficult. How easy it is to anger. How much more courage it takes to forgive.

~

RNH

river

unbuttoned facade
smoothing the sheen of broken light
spine unraveling with each fingerprint
softly poured upon pale skin.

~

RNH

blaze

chasing
a little piece of string
like a star's trail of dust, sparkling
undeniable fascination
whole worlds
within crumbs
loving the magic inside small
beings, the magnificence
revealed when tiny
changes a zero
into a trillion
dazzling pieces
scarring the sky...

~

RNH

Tuesday, July 28, 2015

song type

tapping out the symbols
you and i and you
and i rest quietly on the sloping
curve of an 'N',
singing
all the way down...

~

RNH

frown

you said you would never
wear anything uncomfortable
and i thought, of course
not, the path of least
resistance
suits you well.

~

RNH

Monday, July 27, 2015

sweet girl

oh, bitterness
take your sharp fangs out of me
the bright taste
would like to return.

~

RNH

black cloud

he said, the wolf is out there
and i dreamed
of a black cloud reaper
shrouded in venomous
unseen features
tapping me gently
on the shoulder, i turned
and shook awake, violently
startled, felt
about the comforter to remember
who i am
and where
i am dwelling now
somewhere between wanting
to hold on and desperately
trying to forget.

~

RNH

Friday, July 24, 2015

rebel youth

she tossed her purple hair
and bangs flipped
across the expression
all attitude and anger
pierced
drove her look right through you
with an intensity matched by few
packed her bags
and cats
and left
a trail of no mercy
behind her, the echo
of pounding, feet running
fleeing, calling--
come find me, come find me--
i remember that feeling, too.

~

RNH

steeplechase

lightning struck the steeple
sent a fizzled thrill through structural
integrity melted momentarily
weak in the clothed knees
frayed from so much
praying...

~

RNH

Thursday, July 23, 2015

phantom

you are a blur
a smudged
memory filtered by the morning
fog, you leave
the ground wet
the landscape, unrecognizable.

~

RNH

one more day

sunsets wobbled in his eyes
pooled anguish
exposed by the accident and sudden
death, a promise we all
keep
no shelter to hide
beneath except a broad
forehead, sunburnt
worries
lining the life full
of love and care
feeling no time
enough to relinquish
the splintering earthquake of heartache
wishing for just
one more day.

~

RNH

Wednesday, July 22, 2015

for my Granny

love will never be a past tense
with you
it will always be
an is
Is
Is

love will never be a jagged fault line
with you
it is a red tomato pin
cushion
a pillow to lean on
a soft hand patting your knee

with you, love will never be
something unquantifiable
it will be this many
hugs, this many
stories, this many
birthday phone calls

with you, love will never be
invisible
it will be present
in heartbeats
in wounds that heal.

~

RNH

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

tremble

possibility wrapped up in blankets
when the night turned cold, i held you
and the worries that troubled your
fragmented mind
calmed with the tremors
inside you
slow, then none.

~

RNH

Saturday, July 11, 2015

In transit

When I cannot sleep
I imagine I am
On the subway...

Traveling
To the morning.

~

RNH

Thursday, July 9, 2015

a piece of

let the universe gently
empower you, you are
a piece of something greater,
after all.

~

RNH

flying

flinging wrist with purple
streaks brightly flying
through the air, a splash
of green plops
on your skin and Morrison
wallows in his vain self-
deprecation, a shout
over the tremulous living
room and on the easel
you and i
dance.

~

RNH

Tuesday, July 7, 2015

free play

hands up--

down the slide
we splashed
air gusting
past our ecstatic
faces and through
our curly hair, frizzed
from the heat and humidity, happy
to be outside and free.

~

RNH

unlike

i do not think withholding
love is the only
power i have.
in that way, i am completely
unlike you.

~

RNH

hello, wake up

when did reading become so
passive aggressive, when did
my eyes start leaning toward the floor
when you
entered, my
circumference conveniently started
shrinking when you left, i felt
better.
yet conflicted.
come on now, make up
your mind.

~

RNH

field

pitter patter of rain on the windshield
like liquid, thoughts transform
from one fluid image to another
more than a soft dispelling
of grief
a visceral flood
slams the screen...

~

RNH

Monday, July 6, 2015

Art-chitectural

art CAN change the world. 
it does so every time a person
looks at it
and feels differently. 

~

RNH

from the drawer

it would be helpful to maybe
lose yourself and your identity
like a left sock
always missing from the drawer.

~

RNH

mudslide

the whole house slid
in my photographic
memory, in my dream as vivid
as an old black and white
flickering
and i shook as i rose
vainly reaching from the bed
for a safe place
the door handle just a
few inches
from my grasp...

~

RNH

the buddha

she said
I can show you
the beautiful and the profound
in the world,
but only you
can open your eyes
and understand.

~

RNH

Thursday, July 2, 2015

trencher

sinking into a blackish gray
the bubbles, thick where your apathy
caved and clawed
deep into my forest
green shore lined with the bitter
taste you left in my mouth.

~

RNH

fist full

you, with no grace
keep shaking your fist
appalled by my little
to no reaction.

~

RNH

venerated

at awe
with how you communicate
in full sentences, the unedited
flow of complete thought
i cannot
help but unravel
each vibrant
phrase tasseled, the slamming
of a door
and blood everywhere
before you will see
what i think.

~

RNH

house party

fluttering through the rows of beads
glossy, plastic
ruby, grape and gold
looking for your
profile smiling
on the couches, glasses
clinking and the music turned
way up, too loud.

~

RNH

brush

dusk tilted through the dark slats
your eyelashes
brushed against my burning
cheekbones and i cooled
slowly in your akimbo
arms not wanting
to forget this.

~

RNH

something there

wandering from room to room
wait, i think i left something there...

set the porcelain turquoise
down and forget
how to fill it
i think i left something there

set the phone down and pretend
not to look at it

wait, i think i left something there...

i think i left something there
the city, a skyline
scraped into my skin
i ran
crying
in the opposite direction
recoiling from the violent
cylinder
a thin

pair of stockings
lie
on the floor
like my silhouette
still listens
to your voice
a comb
of fingers
through my memory

lift me to the counter
kiss me

i am all knees
i am all fear
and you
never lose your patience
with me

i am all knees
i am all fear
lift to the counter
forgive me

wandering from room to room
wait, i think left something there

set the porcelain turquoise down
and forget
how to fill it
i think i left something there

wait, i think i left

~

RNH

Wednesday, July 1, 2015

small girl with ice cream

she laughed
the vanilla melting down her small
hand, crinkling the paper
tossing pig-tails tied
with yellow ribbons.

~

RNH

high

stepped with a moon-boot feeling
weightless and gigantic
at the same time
slow motion
intoxicated
running tongue
across soft lips...

~

RNH

thicket

blonde-haired boy
in the forest wanders
thickets of weeds almost
waist-high
looking
for the girl playing
hide-and-go-seek.

~

RNH

pillowcase

come back.
he said
to the ceiling
in the darkness.
come back and stay.
and the pillowcase
understood.

~

RNH

purple martin

the birds
know when to change
shape for velocity
and safety
tucking their wings tight
to their sides
as they
plunge.

~

RNH

permanent imprint

she knew her like
she knew thin lines
across her hands snaked
the signature
of years on skin
she did not have to trace
their path
memorized.

~

RNH

Tuesday, June 30, 2015

dust cloud

heard through closed
eye lids
the news
hitting
like soft clay dirt on uniforms
powder
rising
tears, instead of joy
sadness, instead of success
the eventual
loss of life
screaming through silence.

~

RNH

ambi-

when her right
elbow turned
purple, pink
and blue
she kept it sling-like
to her side
and switched
to her other hand
the spoon.

~

RNH

cast

i think some famous guy said
something about he
among you who is
without
sin, let him
cast the first
something something...

~

RNH

full of it

i would rather be an honest
"sinning"
bisexual
than a hypocrite
full of faith.

~

RNH

what exists

i am not afraid of my shadow
why are you ?
i am not afraid of what exists
within me
my scars
are my proof.

~

RNH

attacking with blindfolds

be careful who you blindly
hate
it might be someone you
love, but have yet
to understand.

~

RNH

textbook speak

studying allusions
brain to textbook
images like math
shape plus content plus two inches
equals
a frame in your l-shaped ideas
and safety-
pinned sentences
i slap
the broken cliche out of every
comma you speak.

~

RNH

Monday, June 29, 2015

the dam

built up stones
to hold back the water
plastering mud
to seal it in place
hands pressed to fortress
the rising, black spirals
swept away
when you triggered
your finger
in one place.

~

RNH

butterfly man

filaments of wings
littered the countertop
dissected minuscule man
fleshy body torn
down segmented lines

this i will believe in

this i will not.

~

RNH

Tuesday, June 23, 2015

free

an empty glass
on a table, free
from picture frames and memory
filled trinkets
turns to examine
itself
in trailing
shadows, in violent
dreams.

~

RNH

miraculous

witness to the miracle
the snow in May
the belief in deep shrouds
of doubt
unmasking the ominous
cloud that cannot keep
each tiny hope
from sparkling.

~

RNH

simple circles

i can do without most
the costumes and the lights
but what i need most
evaporates
the truth
from subtle, simple features.

~

RNH

Wednesday, June 17, 2015

squirrel !

he called them, "squirrel moments"
the times when his brain would scatter
memories like peanuts rolling
down a steep hill
chasing after the kernels' zig-zags...

~

RNH

through the amber

Can I be selfish with you ?
He asked, through the amber
curtains of her hair.
Taking her soft,
scoops of breath
as an answer.

~

RNH

Tuesday, June 16, 2015

afternoon rose

afternoon rose
with a pink tint
she glowed
looking only toward the line
where road and sunset
came together...

~

RNH

silk

when the woods enveloped the light
the velvet branches embracing the night
the moon alone
full, round and bright
illuminated the blue silk of heaven.

~

RNH

Loch Ness

you were not a buoy
you were a dark
and violent sea, thrashing
with ten long tentacled
arms not to hold me
but sabotage
any effort to find shore.

~

RNH

stitching

it didn't look like much
but the new tape held
and the old adhesive fell away
the wound with so much
left to say
mumbling, tinkering over
the gently bending thought
to the sewn-
together suture
stitching the hurt away
stitching...

~

RNH

Monday, June 15, 2015

test

dipped a toe
into the pool of trepidation
forever testing out the waters
expecting shark
for every fin...

~

RNH

tremendous

caught in the downpour
we count not
the minutes in the rain
instead, we open up
our sails and rise
upon the waves...

~

RNH

Thursday, June 11, 2015

Terrier

grabbing the pillow, he
wriggles back and forth
feigns at growling
joyful, bowing
with ears uplifted
places toy
at feet.

~

RNH

shock

on tenth street
and seventh, i
saw
you, too.

~

RNH

settle

took some time to settle
three days later
i let go, wandered
and refocused
pausing around those
tiny seeds i planted
eager to care for them
eager to grow.

~

RNH

contenders

cloth balls up in frustrated
hands, crumpled
tissues litter
the dark maple nightstand, sitting
you search
for conclusions that will always
provide zero possible
answers
spinning and gathering
like a storm.

~

RNH

red lights

a cautionary tale
against pushing small, unlabeled
buttons
raised tracks
warning, barreling
anger
ahead...

~

RNH

Wednesday, June 10, 2015

cocoon

the curl of perfume behind her ears
she tucked her chin into his chest
and watched his shoulders, rib cage
lift
as she exhaled and he
breathed in.

~

RNH

attuned

he paused over the guitar
to tune a string and reassure
a note that it was still
the sound it should be
feeling her tawny
eyes on him.

~

RNH

mist

shaking off the fog of sleep
a glittery haze lifts from the shoulders
and sprinkles down into the diagonal
light looking
for a corner to linger in...

~

RNH

breaking ground

uprooted, endeavoring
to dig down into new ground
reaching out
reaching
for what has already been
severed...

~

RNH

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

needle

killing time with a slow
needle pointing north
every second pulsing
with the thought
of her.

~

RNH

empathy

so many broken
people have walked through
my life and i held
them, though they did not
wish to heal.

~

RNH

the experience

he said the experience was like
a fist fight
walking clean from a wrestling
match, standing
but sore and still bleeding
with one eye shut, swollen
with regret and still seeing
the effects
of one damaged heart loving
another.

~

RNH

a dedicated line

there was a dedicated line
between your voice and mine
and no matter how i unraveled
i could not cut
cut
the cord.

~

RNH

warriors

tell me about your story
tell me about the wars you've fought
and the battles you've lost
the giants, the ogres, and the monsters
in the mind's
eye that turned from enemy
to self and then
enemy, again
sword to the dragon within
unable to recognize the hero
until you had to
fight
just for the words to come out
a small war
just to talk about
the nightmares that you've lived through
behind knowing, gentle
expressions, the sting
of red
scars still healing
tell me how you fight
to preserve the feeling
to continue to be
open, trusting, and forgiving
even of yourself
tell me the darkness is not the only
sky I will see.

~

RNH

Monday, June 8, 2015

awash

salt water tinged blank paper
splash of missing
you, i wash each tender
memory in water
staining each word to page...

~

RNH

Saturday, June 6, 2015

room for more

love should not be an
either/or
it should be an
and...
and...
and...

~

RNH

Thursday, June 4, 2015

partner

he pressed his palm to her belly
the small one moved
a wiggle of recognition
and a broad smile stretched
across his young face, happy
to be found and belonging
to her.

~

RNH

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

foil

my face might give me away
feelings transparent, hardly
but a vibrant floating happy yellow
Mylar, and the lighter
looks of others sweep
right past me
when i am looking, i am looking
for you.

~

RNH

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

statue

his profile, familiar
a constant
reminder that some things
never change, their outline
consistent with the impact
of experience and the force
of lived trial and error, every success
and failure
a small line, visible
on the forehead or corner
of a smile.

~

RNH

ghost

there was a whisper from the past
and it blew open a door
and the wind whipped through her hair
wincing, she
pressed down the ends of her dress
and as instantaneously,
the door shut
the wind quit
and the memory stood
there simply
waiting to be greeted.

~

RNH

Monday, June 1, 2015

flipbook

you liked me straight
and to the point
i liked your meandering,
wandering passages
and when i looked down
and flipped
through the peripheral
you struck me, while i still
held onto your edges.

~

RNH

joint love

twirled the tiny ring to you
the gold circle glinting
between my fingers 
and yours
a thin radius, the joint
mutual affection
for each other
how i never knew
til i asked you, how you never knew
til we kissed.

~

RNH

new bud

the green
did not disappear in the morning
but rather, grew around her
branches embracing
and when the morning fog lifted
she warmed
with the sky
orange, pink and gold.

~

RNH

tonality

raindrops turned into rivers
single sentences to whirlpools
spirals of unspoken
desires breaking into an icy
flood,
cycles
gathering momentum
push, pulsing
with your low voice
pressed lips to exposed throat, i hear
your vulnerability
clearly.

~

RNH

Friday, May 29, 2015

three walls to the room

whispered into the molecules of paint
the fibers of plywood
the pores of concrete
and begged to be freed from this
burden of the only one
who could make everything whole for you
who could make you complete.

~

RNH

fugitive

you and your persecution complex--
take it
and leave.

~

RNH

sliippery

tricky walk down the slip and slide
flippy talk
convoluted meaning, ripped
directions, sending pins
wheeling at all corners
flying, zipping
thought through fences
crashes 
maze of collateral damage
caught
attempting to mend them
only to be tripped again.

~

RNH

Tuesday, May 26, 2015

smush

wolf with the cardboard fangs
bares his teeth
as if they would do much harm
to a pillow.

~

RNH

here, is

here is a doorway
here, is an unlocked window
if you can crawl through
let me in...

~

RNH

in the rain

i picked her up in the rain
she held the umbrella
and i held her
on hip
i try not to grieve
under the unbearable
weight of what i have lost
these unbent knees
keep me upright.

~

RNH

creature, bold

hexagons of mechanism
features folding twain
the creature, bold
in its contortions
faces
the frowning maker's
plain
revealed scorn
refusing the comfort of caresses shorn
from the hand's own flesh
the violent, striking
shapes distort
even love
in a monster
in a man.

~

RNH

worry-full

in the worry-full sea
the waves of self-doubt
washed
over the little boat tossed
about and quivered
against the tidal
turquoise nightmares
burying the fear in depths beneath
the vessel, a prayer
both heard and answered
lifted by the strength of a faith
unseen.

~

RNH

Friday, May 22, 2015

big top

you were hidden behind the curtain
i lifted, laughing
happy to find you
in the labyrinth of circus tents
you, the rarest exhibit
you, with the thousand-watt smile.

~

RNH

He said I am...

Trustworthy.
Dependable.
Honest.
Valued.
Irreplaceable.

~

RNH

wonderment

flickering lights
the basement of wonderment
twinkles fluorescent
in powder blue dreams
the sequins of fuchsia
and teal flash, exuberant
heart, dancing, hula hoops  
ignites the circuitry.

~

RNH

Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Selfish

Selfish
sat at his table
white-knuckling through the pain
refusing to meet the eye-contact
of the obvious
the violent past
the current shame
the future, dim
will always haunt him
specters, gliding neon in the night
the truth, a vivid glow stick apparition
even with all
the off-turned lights.

~

RNH

cherry bird

little red bird
chirped
flapped its round wings
and perched
on tiny brown twigs
the earth
a place to burrow
and adore.

~

RNH

Monday, May 18, 2015

dive

invited into a thousand cerulean
pools
i hold
my breath
you dive.

~

RNH

self-deprecating

she forgave your cruelty because
she struggled to forgive her own.

~

RNH

cymbal

like a live wire.
shaking. 
thrashing. 
raw. 

~

RNH

silver set

silver set on a malleable tongue
i tell you
the truth is just
a blanket to cover
the aching
parts shift like tectonic
plates under the heart
slowly beating
the hammer to ground.

~

RNH

toll

backpacks on strangers
worn sneakers and looks
softly tired, exposing
the day's pull and push.

~

RNH

water cycle

blue as the tile floor
the sea, she remembers
will rise and recoil
to flourish
once more.

~

RNH

marionette

you act like you're
the only person who
suffers in the world
careful you don't
tangle in your strings.

~

RNH

capital letters

Bent over on benches
Half-rotted through with doubt
Scribbled over with the fallacies
His name and hers
A circling route
To madness
Left the pain to work
Its way into permanence
Deepening the scars
Sunk into the soft
Tissue, the acquiescing
Bark, timbers
Written over and over
Again, in capital affirmation
Goodbye.

~

RNH

Sunday, May 17, 2015

fountain

pillows to the trepidation
shaking boots, unraveled gloves
reluctant to lean upon anything
familiar
graffitied walls call me
the fountains of dark parks
sing and i listen
i allow myself to be lost
emotions like lightning
the city is only another
spark
and i navigate the crosshatch, brilliant
the electricity
runs through me
brace for impact
the cobblestones do not give.

~

RNH

devastate

needing quiet
untied the album
noose of memories
names on slate
prayed for quiet
shook the pages loose
let the words
fall
into the fire.

~

RNH

Thursday, May 14, 2015

closed

you need to learn what to listen to
and what to ignore
you keep holding your ear to the hearts
of others
like they are closed, secret-keeping doors.

~

RNH

Beware

I am both strong and soft.
I am both confident and considerate.
I will make you feel special
and at home, in my presence
or I will terrify
The living hell out of you.

~

RNH

Wednesday, May 13, 2015

performer

you told me your friends
could not recognize you
on stage
i wonder why they thought they ever
knew you at all.

~

RNH

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

transitions

Sometimes the sky moves so fast
I can see the clouds change
from fluff to vapor
on other days, the blue
glows so perfectly still
I can feel my heartbeat
in my palms.

~

RNH

Monday, May 11, 2015

Hollow

Instead of truth
She looks for mirrors
And finds herself in them
Every time.

~

RNH

Wednesday, May 6, 2015

flight

The flowers fell
like tiny
snow globes, white
and pink-leafed circles

and I marveled
how what we behold
in the world
so much depends
upon our perspective.

~

RNH

Healing

Out of grief will come revelation.

~

RNH

At Night

At night
My teeth hurt
And it helps
For when I think of you
The ache is constant and permanent
For now, I focus on my mouth.

~

RNH

Monday, May 4, 2015

Small Comfort

I take a small comfort, knowing
That although you may have
Broken small pieces of me,
I have ruined
You, entirely.

~

RNH

Face Forward

See the opportunities,
Not the fear.

~

RNH

The Difference

You cannot keep expecting different behavior from the same people who have choices just like you do, but refuse to change. You have to choose better for yourself.

~

RNH

upon closer inspection

The billboard advertised "DANCE," I thought
I saw the "DANGER," as I moved closer.

~

RNH

From Afar

To the plane, I was a speck.
To my eyes, they were tiny, too.

~

RNH

Thursday, April 30, 2015

memory

i woke up
when you touched my ankle
your hand over the comforter
my body, undressed
i forgot where i was
and sat up, panicked
for about four and a half seconds
a sharp inhale
and then i recognized
your room, in the darkness
your voice, as the stranger
i know now
i wanted to be completely
brutally
honest with you
and then i remembered
you were not him.

~

RNH

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Red Tin

You are just the right amount of spice, my love
Like the peppermints, whole
You keep snapping
From your red tin, small
Purse, their fiery burst
Dissolves in my mouth
With just the right amount
Of sweetness.

~

RNH

cuff

Kicking up the ground
She cuffed
The dust and pawed
The landscape clear
Free from any obstacle
She struck
You, trembling
Before you even caught sight
Of the arrow.

~

RNH

Hunger

He held me by the throat
So that I could not move
So that I could not leave
Deer to the hunter's gun cleaved.

~

RNH

Monday, April 27, 2015

exhale, first

He said, "I've got you."
And I felt I could finally
Let go.

~

RNH

Zipped

Buttons and zippers
Impeding soft fingers
I pull
You where I want you
I pull you within.

~

RNH

Trestle

choo-choo train
with the whistle broken
and the brakes unfixed
keeps charging
watch out
the rails may
twist.

~

RNH

Forbidden

Liquified
I pour myself out
And escape
Through the whispers and unlocked
Keyholes.

~

RNH

Lyricist

Your sonnets fall on empty conch shells.
Your rhapsodies on cement.

~

RNH

Growl

Pushing the boundary
Too much envelope
Licking, you pacify
Only the most
Basic part of me
Growling, but for the moment,
still.

~

RNH

Fatal Figure

Beautiful woman took
One too many
Overdosed on their make believe
Internalized
Fiction
Until she
Collapsed.

~

RNH

Stroke

Touch me where the pain
does not hurt
the lines
erasable
if you make them so.

~

RNH

Weep

Men that are boys that are
Not who they wish they were
The dissatisfaction so tangible
I feel it weeping from their pores.

~

RNH

Saturday, April 25, 2015

Brooklyn Crowd

These people all need a bath
And a clean set of clothes
Someone to care
Whether or not
They come home.

~

RNH

Thursday, April 23, 2015

Linked

She held the heavy door for me
And I held it for him
And so began the double helix
Of kindness
With a single person's motion
The infinity of good will.

~

RNH

fortitude

let me be lost in your voice and your handprints
let me be found in your silence and arms.

~

RNH

Protestor

your sign, unraised
upside down
provokes the passengers
to read, a passage
Biblical and in protest,
love your neighbor
love thyself.

~

RNH

The Visual

Yes, I see you.
I SEE
You.

~

RNH

Pretend

You show me
Your pretenses
With burnt hands
And dirty mind
I see behind your hardened expression
The blackened eyes inside
Your fists, I hold
That precious heart
With moth's wings
In pinched fingers
Thrash what you will.

~

RNH

From Safety

The clack of horses' hooves
Drums loud
Signals the war
And the departure
From safety.

~

RNH

Static

I surrender
So I can possess
This part of you
Only everything
Will be enough
Don't hold back now...

~

RNH

implore

with only one spine
and multiple faces
she looked at me
hands down
eyes imploring
approval seeking consummation
a deceptive vision
the tunnel
luminescent
mirrors reflecting without
reflection, a lost
child seeking attention
and shelter
where there is none...

~

RNH

Thursday, April 16, 2015

message in a bottle

There will be bad days
There will be false hopes
There will be disappointments
And there will be complete
Misunderstandings
And none of these
Spectacular
Catastrophes
Will rob you of your integrity
You will endure.

~

RNH

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

there, I said it

I am not proud of you.
I never have been.

~

RNH

Not Even

It is okay that you disappoint me
You are not even worth
My anger
You are not even worth
My tears.

~

RNH

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

partner in crime

I was the Sherlock to your
Holmes, forever searching out
your tedious, bungled
plot lines stuck in droll
archaic references, theories
in cobblestone, drove you
home from the bottled
crime scene, our Rorschach
test spilling out inky secrets
seeping blood from a silhouette
that did not point directly
to the criminal, but to always
whom you least expected.

~

RNH

Monday, April 13, 2015

his girl

diego's girl
looked at you
with puzzle-piece eyes
jig-sawed your heart in two
and green saw red saw color
blind
bats pawing at each other
naked bodies hung
upside down, her coat
strewn across her uncrossed arms
as ambivalent, she stood
and walked away
with him...

~

RNH

metallurgy

and if the engines could perceive
consciousness in electronics
chains of personality
bonding metal and memory
perfection would not be a possibility
but an answerable question
a series
of one's and O's...

~

RNH 

Second Chance

You will be my boat
And I will be your Noah
And there will be a great flood
And I will guide you home.

~

RNH

scripted patterns

I am tired of being mothers
To these men who were never
Loved by their own
I lose my patience with the same
Patterns
Them, unable to attach to anything
And I, unable to let go.

~

RNH

Herself, Sky

Her face
As the sky
Pours open
And radiates
Light, when she's happy
But lo, the rain when she cries...

~

RNH

Fangs

Feeding the monster
You recoiled
At the sight and sound
Of teeth
As if I would
Not know how to fight back
Nor possess the means.

~

RNH

Claimant

You are not
Possessive of me
You do not care where
Or who I am
With, or even ask
When you can see me, if
You can ever see me again
And yet, I oblige
And yet, I sit silent
And yet, I wait.

~

RNH

Attention

When I give you my attention
It will be
Undivided
Total
And if
I give you my attention
Be ready
Bright lights
Are often
A warning.

~

RNH

Thursday, April 9, 2015

blink

you were all eyes
and brandished swords
swaying good humor and confidence
across the room as you
leaned into your hip
and the musicians
did not even notice
your admittance
until you took up half of their audience
in the time it took to blink.

~

RNH

cling

clung to her body
like a tree trunk climbing
limbs entangled
holding the circumference
of the wild earth inside her
three
elements of contention
burning sky into water
and the texture of her
devotee
admonished to his knees.

~

RNH

The Vision

archway splattered with primary colors
witnesses to apple and lemon
pigments bursting their vibrant
voices singing in the leaves
green as little peas plucked
from the palette of God's
gentle hand...

~

RNH

summer cues

pool-splashing
sunglasses-wearing
stripey-towel-laying-out
plastic-chair-relaxing
coatings of sunscreen
sips from an ice-cold drink...

~

RNH

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

skin lessons

coarse, red bricks
sawed my skin
when i was twelve

and i knew as i caught myself
the house would be empty
and my voice would ring out loud.

~

RNH

serenade

scattered light through tiny
windows, tinted glass
revealing shapes
and shadows
ignorance as blissful
labels serenade them
but never contain.

~

RNH

button-hole anger

button-hole anger
slips in and slips
out
looping the energy
the faint noose of calm
around anarchy
choking on bitterness
silencing disdain.

~

RNH

stack

stacked up the indifference
like patience to a stranger
willing time to gather
her victims
simply because she
told them so.

~

RNH

Monday, April 6, 2015

rabbit heart

i buried her yesterday
out in the backward
her soft little ears held gently
by the earth and my careful
hands
catching
too many tears
to count
too many broken hearts
in need of mending.

~

RNH

exacto

if we were to be exact
sentences might become edges
where oblivious people cut
themselves, tight rope
tiptoe
talking
you lasted for two seconds
i watched you
getting pick-pocketed
careful now
i have my rapiers, too.

~

RNH

Thursday, April 2, 2015

the usual

for Kay Sandoval...

we sat down at a table
sat at many times before
frequent lunches spent between us
frequent stories shared and more
swapped over egg drop soup and wontons
laughter, glowing, warmly streamed
across our tales of the mysterious and the silly
and everything in between
we chose to support each other
through every kind and cruel of weather
we walked together
to our "usual"
sushi lunch spot
donned with a best friend.

~

RNH

Tuesday, March 31, 2015

collision

fluttered through the picture book
like car crashes
ice and glass colliding, scattering
memories like snowflakes
bomb fragments
of your eyes
lips, torso
pages like pavement
flip, flip, flip,
impact. 

~

RNH

Monday, March 30, 2015

stratosphere

I will lose you,
she said,
like a feather from the wing.
I am grateful,
for by knowing you,
I have learned to fly.

~

RNH

Christmas Lights

Strung up through the telephone
My love like Christmas lights
Still twinkles
Left parading a memory
For too long
Days coalescing together
A plastic cord
Rests between my fingers
Waits for sight to fill
The vapid air, tense
With the desire to quell
Any disaster
With paintbrush and toothpaste
As if the mantra of the symbolic
And the routine
Could have kept us safe
We shattered
Though we mimed a good
Forty thousand memories
I watched
As my words froze and sharp
Disintegrated
To dust
Now the pages flip themselves
Clatter in a rush of finality
The end signaled
By the blunt
Wielding of a dial tone.

~

RNH

lifesize

the feeling
that i should be bigger
gregarious
more friendly
to a fault without
being embarrassed
that kind of impenetrable
confidence, the gaze
i only met in a man
as he scanned the outline of my body
for access.

~

RNH

Obsess

Being under a microscope
Is not the same as
Being loved
It is the identical intensity
That drove Frankenstein
To his death.

~

RNH

Char

Without my hand in the fire
I feel
Undesirable
Maybe I should
Strike a match
And walk away...

~

RNH

Sunday, March 29, 2015

As You Appear

I watch women
Change their appearance
As if that is the only thing
They can control
When in truth
There are hurricanes
In your eyes.

~

RNH

Thursday, March 26, 2015

genesis

thread tugged loose by an idea
a nail caught on a two by four
coiled from a sweater, turquoise
that you loved
once
as vividly
as the cells shifting
over your body
love the sunlight
unraveling the unsaid words
in your electric smile.

~

RNH

spark

i could trace you
from the ghost of you
photographed
captured
in teeny capsules
pixels of knowingness
reflecting our affectionate
respect for each other
conscious
of the Polaroid
lingering
the evidence
of a spark.

~

RNH

Seagull

Arc of feather
Sliced through air
The foamy wave's crest
Broken, lifts
Her swollen belly
Pure as snow drifts
Melting clouds
Filtering through her wings.

~

RNH

Deep Blue

Pulled the ribbon
Watched its slow
Blue satin writhe
Its cerulean wreaths
From your hair
Falling
In auburn rivers
That spilt to your shoulders
Knowing
Every moment
I held
The end.

~

RNH

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

something red

Life is beautiful
Any way you look at it
She asks me to play
I spy with her
And I let her win. 

~

RNH

Monday, March 23, 2015

kept

there is something in me that folds
at every mention of your name
at every thought of you passing by
your gestures
your brisk walk
your sharp face
i turn
and reorient
myself to a world
beautiful without you
complete as soon as i allowed truth
to step out of the shadowed corners
and animate
the secrets i always kept.

~

RNH

in the interim

when the conversation pauses
when the adventure halts
when you face two possibilities
and a choice
will you take my outstretched
palm up,
hand
as an offering
of comfort in the interim,
laughter in between.

~

RNH

pincushion

you are the pin in my heart
i keep bleeding
and bleeding
though bereft
of you...

~

RNH

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

reflection

how can an artist create something that is not a reflection of themselves?
musicians capture moods
painters and sculptors freeze moments
why any different for a poet
every syllable, a carved
singing
life of its own.

~

RNH

braille

allowed to linger
the edges found
a convex to her concave
curve of tree trunk carved
a flower, petal, leaf
expressed in splintered
gathered images
she spoke
to the silent
tracing witness
the glaze of blossom
felt
the outline of truth
lifting to his fingers.

~

RNH

would be to say

to say that memories did not flicker
in my soul, like burning candles
low-lit, wavering with the unseen
soft sigh of affection
would be to say
that the sky was not blue
and the salt did not sting
on the open wound, gentle
the soothing hand, quiet
the unspoken, understood
exchange
and the last place i
touched you, elbow
to the palm still
glows
waits to be
illuminated again.

~

RNH

Monday, March 16, 2015

a vicious circle

it was a pretty circle
around a pretty bunch
of flowers
around a pretty curl
of hair
the girl, always
bending to fashion
and accommodating
and reassuring
and taking care
of everyone
but herself
she spliced
the band, in two
and walked away

clean.

~

RNH

the dichotomy

I had wanted to believe
in the permanence of values
I had wanted to believe
in the honest growth of things
I often sank, listless, dissuaded
by the difference
between the wish and what
I saw in you
no one would believe.

~

RNH

storm

When you go through your most difficult times
When you throw up your hands
When you cry out defeat
The storm will cloud darkly
and inevitably, clear
the sky
to show
the strength you needed
you possessed
all along.

~

RNH

Disney Character

So this is what happens when you grow up on Disney
even when you've evolved into a feminist
even when you believe in equal
rights and equal responsibility
You still end up 
waiting for that illusion of a prince
to show up, knocking at your door
tossing pebbles at your windowpane
when you know that nothing
worth having ever
appears instantaneously
and yet you still
spend years, decades of deceiving
Yourself, singing
"I am unsure 
and incomplete..."
without you, as if solitude
were something to avoid
with both hands, dissecting
the plot lines, when you know
that clarity only distills
in silence 
when will you stop
waiting for an arrival
and create your own happiness
because you are already really real, girl 
I promise you
so go--
take on the world
and take off those plastic mouse ears
be yourself
once and for all
You are worthy
You are enough.

~

RNH

Textbook Perfect

Loathe the texture
Every touch, a crevice
To tear at, a cliff
Not high enough
To leap
From this distance
Off the overarching fear, the curve
Of expectation, never enough
The lesson I learned
From you.

~

RNH

Thursday, March 12, 2015

parapet

Love like a parapet
I want to throw myself from. 

~

RNH

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Two Rocks

Faced with two rocks
And a hard place
I stared down the beaten path
And challenged its
Soft dust to rise
The tan earth's breath to speak.
Will this
Be your defining moment?
Daring, immovable she
Asked me.
From kneeling, I stood.
Absolutely not.
I will never
Let destruction create
Who I am.

~

RNH

Tuesday, March 10, 2015

little frog

the little frog said to the tall, proud oak
when will i grow strong and stretch
my arms out, just like you
the tall oak said, gently bending to the wind,
you are noble as you are
doubt not the strength that lies within.

the little frog asked the twinkling current of the stream
when will i be fast and shape
my own path, just like you
the bright stream replied, quietly flowing around the tree,
you are exceptional as you are
doubt not the light you cannot see.

the little frog spoke to the swirling, singing wind  
when will i rise up and find
my brave voice, just like you
the smiling sky answered, rustling leaf and rippling water,
you are, even now, invincible
doubt not your delicate heart.

~

RNH

Thursday, March 5, 2015

Shell

Fingers on the lips' container
The error pointing out 
Your ways, the grandeur 
Blindly hoping for better
The reality slapping truths
Into faces bottled
In faces, the little dolls
Smiling, I waited
For revelation to reveal
Your secret
Admiring the most
Artificial
True
Nature
I sacrificed
My character for your shell.

~

RNH

Wednesday, March 4, 2015

tulle

in between the folds of tulle
i tucked the days and second
hands
of us
the ticking
off minutes
until we,
the explosion,
fell quietly
tangled in the mesh, i know
you thought i
lost myself
in the gauze, i know you thought i 
could not see
---
through the black bars, the black caustic
screen over my heart
---
broken, shaking in the prison of my chest
i beheld you, finally
truthfully
as you are
and calmly picked up the pieces
from the floor
see
how they glitter
the shards
the sequins
in my new dress.

~

RNH

Monday, March 2, 2015

Useful

"Love is only useful when it's useful."
I know,
I know. 
I remember
How you loved me. 

~

RNH

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

proof

under circus lights
I did not know which way to look first
the costumes or the scenery
the set pieces occupying
my eyes
like only shiny things will do
absorbing and reflecting
you entirely
even the pieces you thought you hid so well
obvious
when I cut the switch.

~

RNH

Hoop

The table jumped
The pieces leapt and forced
To shift
When the earthquake of the moment
Hit and moved you
From your defining
Sheathe, you railed
Against the ghostly, trapping
Circumstance and desired
Most of all, to scatter
Free.

~

RNH

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Suture

And when I spoke
I chose my words carefully
Pen to paper, ink--a thread
And when I saw
I looked with both eyes, opened
My heart
And understood.

~

RNH

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

I will not ask you to fill my silence
or this void
I will find a way
myself.

~

RNH

Returning Kindness

Last week, while on the train ride home, a random stranger handed me a packet of tissues. The blue and white plastic crinkled in my fingers as I thanked her. I usually keep some in my purse, but had, embarrassingly, gone through all of mine.

A few days later, at the same station, I saw a young girl step onto the train. With her backpack slung over one shoulder and her hoodie up, she moved into the corner, then sank down to the shoeprint-dirty floor. Hunched over her phone, she stared blankly at the paragraphs of bubbled text messages. Her nose blushed and her cheeks shone, covered with tears.

I told her to keep them, like the woman had told me.

We all crumble sometimes. Don't close your eyes. Pay it forward.

~

RNH

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

tomorrow

because tomorrow will be
beautiful
and full of life
like a poem...

~

RNH

Tuesday, February 3, 2015

Harpoon

i know you feared the depth
i know you cast your line
and feared its measurement
avoiding anchor
as if never
to see the shore
or hope
for safety
i know you did
i know you
scoured the water
for an answer
that would not change
or disappear
their liquid center
caught in the mystery of your
self shifting and momentum
gathering, rising tidal
fury as terrifying
as its calm
i know you
hide when the sky becomes dark
catastrophe
teaching you all too well
the exterior hardens, the eyes
close, the ship turns
away
from itself
leaving becomes
the only palpable recourse
i know
no matter how many times you crash
and fail
i will still be here.

~

RNH

Monday, February 2, 2015

birdsong

And Adam in the cage
no longer grieved
for his lost Eve
no longer wept for his
heart fled
surrendered
alive
when he cut free...

~

RNH

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Vincent

When Van Gogh stopped drinking his absinthe
And the swirls no longer spoke to him
Screaming
Crying
Paint me

When the colors broke and bled
And their intensity
Reeled
Without name

That day
The world grew silent
and his hands
became still.

~

RNH

Thursday, January 22, 2015

Tah-Dah

In these shredded, mangled
pieces, I will find
beauty, I will create
them, make them
whole.
I am the sorcerer with their hands
floating over a black globe.
I am the magician
with the white doves up
her sleeves.

~

RNH

Carnivore

I thought that it would fade
this back and forth
this tidal see-saw
rhythm beckoning like
the moon
sat upon your shoulder
whispering how to feel
and where to run to
howling
tripping
blind...

~

RNH

the armory

embrace your chaos
the weapons
lining gray, unblinking
stone walls
axe and flail and sword
drawn, glinting
in the silver
the metallic reflection of your
self.

~

RNH

Squished

I saw you, splattered
on the sidewalk
The squished form of you
A juice box, apple
And your heart's diagonal
Matter cried
out
for destruction
Cried out
to live again.

~

RNH

Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Ideas

When science and art both sought the same thing--to understand the world.
Transporting the reader, as a way to get closer to nature, closer to the essence of things.
Reimagining oneself, to better see the truth.
Pieces to a whole.
Outside experience and inward emotion.
Connectivity.
Permanence.
Instability.
Death.
Meaning to every moment.

~

RNH

Growing...

I used to think that the greatest strength I had was to leave. That the greatest power I had, the only power I had, was the choice of whether or not I stayed. One could choose where the heart went--you might not be able to choose anything else, but you had control over that. I learned that the people around you, even the people that love you, will fall away from you--like a blossom from a seed. You will end up alone. And your vulnerability will be your greatest weakness. I never saw love as a connecting force. I never thought that love would make you stronger. I never knew love as anything but destructive. It would ruin every delicate piece of you. It would make you regret the soft corners of yourself.

So you file them away...

You make yourself sharp on the edges and pointy. You become your own weapon. When enough people have disappointed you and hurt you and you feel like you have no ground to stand on, you create your own fortress. Running down its deepest, darkest hallways, you scream at the walls. At least they will not betray you. At least here, you are safe.

I used to believe that all of these things were true. I believed that the best way you could arm yourself against the world--the best way you could protect yourself--was to be impenetrable. Feel nothing. Never let your guard down. Never let anyone get close to you. They will only hurt you again, anyways.

Love would leave you at the first sign of frailty--irreparably lost, like petals to the cold.

But then the seed took root. You finally (FINALLY) evolved. Trusted the ground to stay where it was. The sky to persist. Trusted that your heart would NOT abandon you at a moment's notice.

And the small thing grew up.... and grew out.

It took me a very long time to reign in the impulse to rip and run away from the world. It's still there. But I can see past the fortress walls now. And, look ! The sun is shining...

I learned how love CAN make you stronger. I learned how beautiful it is to connect to other people. You do not have to be alone with your joy, or with your pain. It is okay to ask for help. It is okay to fall... and stand up... and fall again. I believe we are not measured by our frailties, but by our ability to learn from them. Growth is a constant, difficult, worthwhile process. Let it teach you. Blossom in its wake.

And no matter what, love will still be there, in the end. Choose to give... please choose to stay...

~

RNH

Friday, January 16, 2015

Covered

I watched a woman put on make-up
Stripes of beige like wet war paint
I wondered why
We have to cover ourselves
To feel strong
And why I feel so bold
Without it.

~

RNH

Thursday, January 8, 2015

fierce

Force of the jaw gripped
and ripped at last year's edges
took the trepidation
and ran
its shredded images trailing
like golden
tassels to the robe
of dust rising under the pound
of determination trampling
each doubt
by the proud
soul
glowing, brilliant
as this new day.

~

RNH