thorns

monsters grew voices the way
that some plants grow thorns
and the necessity
to protect one's self became embodied
in the form
of something prickly and dangerous
the way that essence guards the shorn
with teeth and carved nails
the armor to the veracity within.

~

RNH

the plank

patience walks the floorboards
treats it like a pirate's plank
destroys the laminate with her stubborn
pacing, the urgency
leaves permanent marks on the blank
worried countenance flickers
and with all keys
held prisoner runs
the risk of being open even if
no one else will.

~

RNH

two stick figures

from separate hemispheres
we write in the sky
my clouds always scripted
yours, puffy and wide
the notes easy to translate
and just as soon, torn
by the crash of one blue sea
as we stand
on different shores.

~

RNH

the hearth

around every fragility
i would build a log fire
and keep it strong, the crosshatch
of trust and stability
so that every storm weathered
would bring us closer together, the tinder
in our hands
kindled, anew.
~

RNH

a stray

not sure what caught me

about that moment

her frayed jeans fluttered

on the bench right next to me

as she tucked a stray blonde hair, a long

strand of a whisper lassoed around

on fingertips

i dug my palms into the slats 

and pretended not to hear me

fumbling

with my basket full of words 

as i bent under a feeling that refused to cooperate, that bowed 

like heavy-laden flowers, full of next year's promises

and i, too, unapologetic,  

took her hand in mine and vowed.

~

RNH

in the defense of all this

i made a list of the things that i'm afraid of
and i crumpled it up, ashamed
of what it said
and so many times i have hated
what my heart feared
and on so many days i have hated myself
for being afraid
and the spiral of self-doubt and self-
effacement is a corrosive one
and it does not leave
beautiful ideas in its wake, it empties
moments of their depth and spontaneity, it robs
the memory of its joy, insisting
blank-
faced that the only good found in this world
is selfishly driven and tiny and incrementally
doled out
for your best
and this loud, loud anarchy
sits in the middle of my kitchen banging
pots and pans of self-
importance and i
loathe her all the while.
i try to quiet the mind with reasoning
i try to explain to her with theories and i quote
all her favorite songs, she
cries louder, i point
to the fact that i am still here and she demands
to know why.
after several seconds of held breath,
i reply:
1. you are allowed to feel.
2. you are allowed to be wrong.
3. you are allowed to make all of the glorious mistakes that you are going
to make in this lifetime and keep living.
i promise none of them will break you.
i promise you will be stronger by your own choice.
but the best argument,
the greatest itemization i can make
in the defense of all this,
is
4. you are allowed to love
you are so loved
and no amount of fear can steal that.

~

RNH

vital

buried under the frozen pool
fearful of swimming, the consciousness waits
and though buoyant, at the surface warily stares
and though hopeful, toward the icy ceiling barely moves
and in the weird white light cutting
through perception
every instinct knows that down here
life will only suffocate.

~

RNH

magnetic

magnetic letters click
on the fridge and spell
out phrases, you recognize
i rearrange
and show you more
than i ever anticipated
and happy
when you learn the pieces, too.

~

RNH

purple heart

traced the buttons down

the feeling lip-locked and certain

amber eyes keep looking

around, waiting to be proven

wrong and all the cards

face-forward form

a dangerous fan when you're trying to stay

calm

and enveloped

with the curtains open and the mercurial glass

see-through.

~

RNH 

textures

texture of a tendency
the soft fur of an underbelly
the muted turquoise of a young field
bending, reaching
for the vocal wind
and the strong arms
of a glowing sky, present
in all peripherals
the welcome-home of vulnerability
to someplace safe and warm.

~

RNH